On Birthday Parties: Moms, Can We Take It Down a Notch?

"Gumball Party" from HGTV
“Gumball Party” from HGTV

Luca’s first birthday is around the corner (sort of… it’s 3 months away) so naturally I’m daydreaming about invitations, themes and cupcakes. I guess as a SAHM I have nothing better to do than to plan an extravagant party right?? Wrong. I can barely keep my house clean let alone plan a ridiculously intricate birthday party for a baby who won’t even appreciate my efforts. Yet, other moms seem to find the time…and I mean, they find a LOT of time. I’m not trying to point any fingers or anything but SERIOUSLY?? THIS is out-of-control!! YOU HUNG A MOON CAKE FROM YOUR CEILING??? WHAA….??? There are no words.

Ok, Moms… Level with me. I get that decorating is super fun and you love your kid SO much… but come on guys, you’re setting the bar WAY too high here. People like me who just want to order food and kick-back feel totally lame because we didn’t hand-make each kid a personalized super-hero cape. Right… so there’s the problem. I’ll admit it… This is about my own insecurities… I don’t want to look bad in front of other moms. Like, I’m afraid I’ll be judged or something. Or maybe it’s just that I’ll miss hearing the compliments, “Oh wow! You MADE that?? That’s so cute!!” And inside I could be like, “Heck ya I made that, I’m awesome!” I think really what it is for me is that there’s an expectation. I’m a Stay-at-Home-Mom so my kid’s first birthday party should be exploding with DIY details. Honestly, I’d rather spend the time I could be crafting on other things, like playing with my kid.

Truthfully, I think that if you are into that stuff, you should go for it. Just don’t stress about it. For me, I do plan on making a couple of little special things here and there because it is fun for me (to a certain extent). BUT, my motivation can’t be because I don’t want to feel lame compared to other moms. I have to respect that some moms are way crafty and have more time and energy to do those types of things for parties. It’s just not my thing. I want to be relaxed before, during and after his party. For me, creating a Pintastic party is not relaxing. It’s stressful. DIY projects always take longer and more of my energy than I planned. Aaand… I’m always surprised that all of my efforts don’t necessarily make that big of a difference on the party. I want to find a way to choose the special touches that actually have some kind of an impact. I guess I’m talking about efficiency here. What are the things that I could do that will actually make the party more fun, not just cute? I hate doing projects that take forever and then just get tossed in the trash after the party is over.

So what do you veteran moms suggest? What things do you take the time to do and what things do you pass on? New mamas, what do you plan on doing for your baby’s first birthday?

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5 thoughts on “On Birthday Parties: Moms, Can We Take It Down a Notch?

  1. I am not a mom. Your post made me ACTUALLY LOL. thank you for the giggle! I’m currently planning a “Pinterest Themed” Bridal Shower for my sister. It is in two weeks and I am already regretting all the little projects that I need to complete. (Personalizing 30 miniature clipboards…what?!) Best wishes on planning the “perfect” party!

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  2. I love this post. Thank you for it. We’re celebrating our fourth child’s first birthday this week. My (unmarried) sister very happily volunteered (after I hinted) to make the cake -two points, his way craftiet than me godmother gladly accepted my not so cryptic suggestion to make him a birthday bunting for his high chair – two more points,, and I plan on asking the grandmas for help with the food -win!
    I would have tried to do so that and more still by myself with our first child. In fact I did and failed and didn’t even get to “eat the cake”. And I was so busy preparing and doing I hardly got to enjoy my daughter ok her birthday.
    I’ve learned it’s much more important to celebrate the day of their birth by keeping things low key and asking/delegating help than to stress about it so much you can hardly breathe before the party even starts. Simplicity should be your theme. 🙂
    And remember, in a way, it’s yours and your husband’s “birthing day” to remember and celebrate too.

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  3. […] On Birthday Parties: Moms, Can We Take It Down a Notch? – Amen, Sista! Like I said there: We’re celebrating our fourth child’s first birthday this week. My (unmarried) sister very happily volunteered (after I hinted) to make the cake – two points, his way-craftier-than-me godmother gladly accepted my not so cryptic suggestion to make him a birthday bunting for his high chair – two more points, and I plan on asking the grandmas for help with the food – win! I would have tried to do all that and more all by myself with our first child. In fact I did and failed and didn’t even get to “eat the cake”. And I was so busy preparing and doing I hardly got to enjoy my daughter on her birthday. I’ve learned it’s much more important to celebrate the day of their birth by keeping things low key and asking/delegating help than to stress about it so much you can hardly breathe before the party even starts. Simplicity should be your theme. And remember, in a way, it’s yours and your husband’s “birthing day” to remember and celebrate too. […]

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    • Haha! That is so awesome that you’ve had so much help, great thinking! I may to get resourceful myself… Afterall, like you said, this is a day for my husband and I to celebrate our own accomplishment as well! Cheers!

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      • Yes it went very well! And I think everyone was glad I included them in the preparations. One secret to parenting success, like in business, is skillful and unapologetic delegation.

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