A little while ago, a friend told me that two of her single and childless friends had begun reading my blog. “They LOVE it!” she said enthusiastically,”It’s so funny, they were having lunch together and they were talking about having kids and they were both like ‘I’m not sure I want to anymore!’ because of what they’ve read on your blog.” She laughed and I laughed… but something kind of sat wrong with me about it. Do I really make motherhood sound that bad? I wondered. I mean, the truth is, it is really hard and contrary to the seeming popular opinion I don’t think it’s for everybody. I think we all assume that we will have kids because that’s what everyone else does. I hope that my blog, a documentation of a REAL journey through motherhood, does motivate people to take a step back and decide whether parenthood is really for them.
On the other hand, I want my blog to be a documentation of a REAL journey through motherhood and it is NOT that if I’m only writing about the bad. Truly, there are many heart-warming, beautiful, and just plain FUN times as a parent…and I’m only 8 months in! I think the thing is, we all want to become parents for the good times. Sure, we think we know there will be hard times, but we don’t really get it until we’re in it. There aren’t just “hard times,” it’s a completely life-altering experience. Yet, despite the painful removal of my pride and entitlement I have been delighted daily by this precious little being that God brought into our lives. Just to give you an idea of what it’s like to be blessed by a little on a daily basis, here are some of my favorite moments…
So now you see, it’s not ALL bad… there are many good times. In general, I absolutely love being a mom. Admittedly, there are times when I hate it, but those times are infrequent and as time goes on, they are becoming even more rare. I think the hardest part is getting over the fact that kids are people. Just like in any relationship, people are not convenient. Sure, you can try to train them and shape them all you want, but they are still people, with preferences and bodies that change and wills all to their own, just like you and me. Relationships are hard because they involve people. I think once we accept that and then learn how to work with them instead of against them, we become freed-up to enjoy their people-ness. Once you have kids, your life will never be the same, but it will never be the same.
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